Tuesday, July 17, 2012

The BLOG Days of Summer…

Summer is upon us and it couldn’t be hotter. A mere 97 today in Cleveland. My day got even sunnier and warmer as I was nominated for a blogger award. This is the nice warm fuzzy feeling type of heat however, not the sticky, sweaty, smelly, I need a Nestea Plunge ASAP kinda stuff. Yep, I got a “Sunshine Blogger Award” from Jenn over at My Daily Jenn-ism. A big thanks to her for “brightening my day” with her sweet sunshiny self.





I have learned from my short time as a blogger that there is a whole blogging “community” and they really help each other. I had no idea what I was doing when I started my blog. "The blind leading the blind." I was the vision-impaired individual on both sides of that equation. I was surprised to witness the level of friendship and support there is between “peer” bloggers. Certainly, not an environment of cut-throat competition but one of encouragement. I haven’t had the opportunity to make many “blog friends” yet, but it’s nice to see how supportive fellow bloggers are with each other. Kudos to all those bloggers. I’m so impressed with you all.

While I’m shouting out to them, I’d also like to thank my friends and family that have been supportive. Some unlikely subjects in there even, people I wouldn’t have thought would read one word, have read every word. So very humbled each and every time. Can’t thank you all enough.


On to the rules of the “Sunshine Blogger Award.”

The Rules:
Yes, I know rules suck – I’m not a fan either, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do, right?
1)      Include award logo in a post or on your blog page
2)     Answer (10) questions about yourself
3)     Nominate 10-12 other fabulous bloggers
4)      Link your nominees to the post and comment on their blog, letting them know about the award
5)      Share the love and link the person who nominated you

Ten Questions and Answers:

1)      What would you most like to change about yourself?



Like as in surgically change or enhance about yourself? Let me roll-out my wish list. Oh, that probably wasn’t the intention of this question, huh? There’s really not one specific thing. I hope that I am changing and evolving, learning from my mistakes and continually making myself a little bit better of a person each and every day. With any luck, I am a better than I was 10 years ago, and that younger version of me was better than the person I was twenty years ago.
2)  What is your theme song? 
I love, love, love to dance and will pretty much dance around anywhere or any time. So my “theme” song is any that will get me up and dancing. We only live once… “Dance like no one is watching.”

3)  One part of your life, a memory, action, etc., that you wish you could remove from your brain? 
Everything that happens to you, good, bad, or indifferent, makes you who you are today. So why change the past. It’s over. Learn from it and move on. My marriage/divorce was definitely not a highlight or anything that I’d choose to relive but I have two great kids because of it and I truly think they and I are closer because of the struggles we had to endure together. It certainly wasn’t pleasant or easy at times, but there have been many benefits in the long run.

4)      What generation do you wish you had been a part of? 
This current generation has the BEST shoes! I pick now! 
YESSS!
NOOOOOOO!

5)  What was your favorite childhood toy?
Many miles were put on our Lemon Twists! We’d spend hours going up and down our somewhat “W” shaped driveway. Kids were easily entertained back then. Plastic fruit on a rope? Really?!? 

6) What is your favorite housecleaning chore? 
Decisions… decisions… decisions… let’s see… how do I pick just one… ummm… my answer is… NONE. Zip. Zilch. Surely you jest!? Actually, I’d like to change my answer on question number one… what would I most like to change about myself? I’d like to have a good/reliable weekly house keeper. Next question please.
7)  Do you Twitter? 
Not yet but hopefully soon. Tweet, retweet, hashtags??  Huh? Pardon me for a sec while I consult the next book I need to read.

8)      Any goals? 
You gotta have goals… goals for the day… goals for the week… long term goals. Sans any goals I would totally be living in dirty house that I avoided cleaning due to my non-stop dancing and shoe shopping.
9)      Do you really drink margaritas all the time? 
“All the time??” Why? What have you heard? They certainly are one of my favs, but “all the time?” Nah… that’s even a stretch for me and my very fun friends. However, you know what they say, “When in ‘Rome’”… I will partake, and “Rome” here being Mexico, a Mexican restaurant, or a friend's party. On the rocks with salt please…
10)  What is the ugliest car you’ve ever driven and were embarrassed to be seen in? 
A friends Nova always overflowing much like a clown car with tons of my high school girlfriends was the ugliest but we weren’t embarrassed. Oh no. We were more than happy to be carted around in the rusted-out death trap, as she was the first to drive in our class.
See those smiles? Happy. Happy.

I'm going to break the rules of this already. These bloggers are busy people and I can't imagine the time they already spend on their "trade." My "nominations" portion of this is just going to highlight and share a few of my favorite individual blogs. Enjoy reading the below:

Y The Underachiever’s Guide to Being a Domestic Goddess was my first blogger "friend." Cracks me up daily either via her blogs or her Facebook page. Plus she's an absolute doll and is originally from O-HI-O! Her Laundry Baskets and Landspeeders.. is one of favs.

Y If you haven’t read People I Want to Punch in the Throat’s blog on “Over Achieving Elf on the Shelf Mommies” you must be living under a rock? It’s HILARIOUS. Don’t miss out.

Y  "My Mother, My Daughter" is beyond powerful and will definitely have you counting your blessings. Heart wrenching story written by the blogger at Bitches Gotta Eat.

Y The Martini Diva’s blog is just a fun place to be. Browse around… nothing to read… but plenty to drink.

Y  I did a guest blog, “No Fairy Tale for Cleveland… Yet” on this site and he, Jim Moorman, placed it under his “Opinions of an Asshole” section. Really? Thanks Jim. Thanks a lot. But he is a funny dude and I love his Jim 101 – 101 Jim Moorman Factoids. Everything you did (& perhaps didn't) want to know about Jim Moorman!

Y  Go over to Write, Rinse, Repeat and Read, Rinse and Repeat, Repeat, Repeat. Funny stuff. Particularly, “I Like My Kids, Not Yours."

Y  I dare you to find something that doesn’t have you L-O-Ling on this page, The Bearded Iris! Go ahead! I dare ya! Don’t miss “Aw, nuts. Or how puppies and testicles are related."

Y  Insane in the Mom Brain (which I can NOT say without singing it in my head with the Cypress Hill beat), well, she just has limitless amounts of energy… limitless. Check-out “I Have A Mother F-ing Ballerina and I'm Not Afraid To Use Her... AKA: If you're thinking of burgling me, think again.”



Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Knick-Knack-ophobia

Bellied up on a visit to a much-loved sushi bar and fast approaching an unagi, wasabi and spicy tuna induced coma, I am roused from my food trance by the following:




“Just. What. Is. He. Looking. At?”

It is staring at me with its yellow eyes, intense lifeless yellow eyes. Its paw waving at me, a shiny golden paw. Both gaze and wave are constant and unrelenting. Back and forth with the golden paw, back and forth, never missing a beat. Do I have seaweed stuck in my teeth? Rice on my chin? Do I need a refill on my plum wine? “What does it want?” Go away strange cat. Please go away.

Back to my sushi. Chop-sticks recommence, click click, soy sauce is-a-splish-splashing, wonderful levels of gluttony in sight once again, but yet I can feel this feline beckoning me. The death stare this creature has on me is palpable. I can not overt my peripheral vision from the rhythmic arm movements. I am distracted. I am unsettled. I am scared. Yes, I am afraid of a glittering porcelain knick-knack. I mean look at that thing. It could star in a slasher movie, ee aww, ee aww. OK, that sounds more like a donkey, but I don’t know how to write-out in words the horror flick sound effects that accompany the untimely demise of someone via stabbing. "Ee aww, ee aww" will just have to do and picture a "Psycho" killing type scene in your head while you're at it.

I made it out of the sushi joint alive, nonetheless this is a forewarning, if one of those cats ever cross your path, do not get too close. That sucker could go postal at any moment. The alleged friendly wave quickly turning to a full-blown scratch attack or a stabbing, drawing a tiny little switchblade on your ass. Ee aww, ee aww. There’s something about that stare too, it is hypnotic. Do not, I repeat, do not, gaze directly into those mesmerizing eyes. You won’t be able to read any of my stuff if you are turned to stone and I would miss you dearly. Glance away. I know it is hard but you must do this, if not for yourself, do it for me. Do it for Sherrie Sherrie.

With the nightmare of that scary statue long behind me, I’m enjoying a pedicure at a local nail salon and chillaxing in a heavenly massage chair. Feet soaking in luxurious bubbly water, tensions being worked out of my back, pretty toes soon to be mine. This is the life. Suddenly, I have that all too familiar feeling of someone watching me. Looking around and what do I spy sitting way over on a shelf, eyeballing and shaking its fist at me? You know it… I’m being stalked now… it is following me!


Ee aww, ee aww. For the love of God, run for your lives!

But, finish my toes first please. Thanks.




Monday, July 2, 2012

No Fairy Tale for Cleveland... Yet

No blog located here this time, as I wrote a guest blog for my friend Jim Moorman.

He’s like a “real” writer… has a book and everything… check it out!

Click    > HERE <   to get to my story over on his page.

Thanks for reading "No Fairy Tale for Cleveland... Yet" over yonder and for browsing his site!! He is really, really funny... you won't be disappointed.


Jim’s site:   http://jimmoormanbooks.com/

Jim’s book:




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